Attack Of The Rabid Fangirls
by That's Mrs. Nox To You
Summary: Bakura is being chased by a gothic cult of fangirls!


**AtTaCk Of ThE RaBiD FaNgIrLs!**

**A One-Chapter Bakura Fanfiction!**

"**I keep your photograph,**

**And I know it serves me well.**

**I want to hold you high…"**

**--Seether, _Broken_**

_**Disclaimer:**_

**My disclaimer ish right here!**

**Bakura is NOT mine, he belongs to Mr. Takahashi!**

**AAAAAND South Park belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker!**

**I am, of course, referring to the episode where Saddam Hussein returns to Satan (Where was I gonna go, Detroit!) and kills Chris the Pussy! -**

**South Park KICKS ARSE!**

**I DID, however, create the fan girls! Serenity Lost, Black Siren, Ice Heart, and Stone Rose are my own characters with really cheesy names! **

It's a normal day in Los Angeles... The sun is shining, the birds are dying, the sky is a beautiful shade of smog-brown, Bakura just ran down the street... Wait, what was that last bit!

So, like I said, it's just another day in LA, and there's a HY-OOGE group of goth girls running around screaming all over the streets! The leader, a woman in her early twenties with three piercings in her nose and green hair down to her waist, shouted to the members of The Cult of Yami Bakura, "KEEP LOOKING! DON'T STOP UNTIL YOU'VE FOUND BAKURA AND RELEASED HIS YAMI! OR SERENITY LOST WILL LOCK THE DOOR!" The girls spread out in packs, scurrying around to find the target…

MEANWHILE, IN THE EXACT SAME PLACE!

A guy around 16 (Sin: I honestly don't know Bakura's age, I'm not THAT big a fan! But I have the sexiest picture of him! HE'S SO GORGEOUS! -) is backed against a wall of an alley behind a dumpster, sweating in the Los Angeles heat. Bakura had had no idea how hot it could get in LA, but now he felt like the ozone was melting before his eyes.

But Bakura had bigger issues to deal with at the moment. Obsessive (and creepy) fangirls were chasing after him; They had been since he got off his flight! Two of them scurried past the entrance to the alley, dressed entirely in black, with billowing cloaks and knee-high spiked combat boots in the middle of the Southern California summer. One of them had a Sennen Ring dangling from her neck, and the other had a golden eye painted on her forehead. Fortunately, they didn't even bother looking for him down the alley. Bakura had chosen this particular alley because it looked like the kind of place where an axe-wielding hobo would be lurking to suck the blood from a girl until there was nothing but an empty carcass left (Sin: Aren't I creative! -). He had thought, however, that the golden light emitting from his REAL Sennen Ring would give his location away immediately. He heard the cold (Sin: And INCREDIBLY SEXY!) voice of his Yami speaking to him in his head, as he always did when he tried to release himself from the Ring.

_Bakura-chan, let me take over._

"No way, not again! You'll just try to kill me again!" he whispered, praying that his predators wouldn't hear him talking.

_Okay, so I got you hospitalized a time or two. So what? I've changed!_

"Oh yeah, I've watched too much South Park to believe that."

_Fine, then. I guess you want to do this the _hard_ way…_

A group of Bakura's stalkers strolled quickly through the city streets, gazing around at their surroundings, looking for any signs of Bakura's whereabouts. The leader of this branch of the COYB, Stone Rose, an anorexic girl with wavy purple hair and a black rose pierced into her right eyebrow, scanned the area through dark sunglasses. She had a disability that blinded her in sunlight, so she always wore glasses. Her hands were balled into tiny fists, the bones jutting out of her wrists, and she called to her followers, "Keep up! We don't have much farther until we get to our Look-Out Site."

"Can we take a quick rest? I've been walking in these boots for hours!" Black Siren complained warily, lagging far behind her and Ice Heart, a skinny girl with black heart rings on each finger and silver hair, dyed to show her affection for Bakura.

Black Siren was a tall girl of fifteen, her brow covered with sweat and her white-blonde hair covering one side of her face, the side where one of her eyes had been sacrificed to the giant Bakura statue back at the Cult of Yami Bakura Headquarters. All of the girls in CYB had to give some kind of offering to enter the cult, either money or blood. She had been very poor and couldn't afford to pay her way into the cult, so she allowed them to cut out her eye for acceptance.

"Quit whining, Siren, we're almost there!" Stone Rose shouted back to her, flipping her off. Even with one of her eyes sacrificed, showing her eternal bond to Yami Bakura, none of the members of CYB accepted her because most of them were rich enough to pay their way in. In Stone Rose's eyes, Black Siren was just a girl who was obsessed with being a part of something, prepared to do anything to be popular. Siren stuck her tongue out at Stone Rose, revealing two metal barbells pierced into it.

Ice Heart stopped suddenly, staring off at a building.

"Ice, we have to keep moving!" Siren called, already ahead of her, but Ice Heart was frozen where she stood. She pointed a shaking finger at one of the many alleys in Los Angeles. Rays of golden light were emitting from the depths of the alley, lighting the grease-streaked walls. Her eyes shone with anticipation, and she wondered, Could that be my Bakura?

"Siren! Stone Rose! Look at the light!" she exploded, waving her arms frantically. Stone Rose and Black Siren stared at the light, looked at each other, and rushed across the street, dodging the oncoming traffic, Ice Heart following closely behind them.

Yami Bakura eased himself against the wall. He had to fight with his lighter side more than usual for that, and it had actually taken an ounce of his strength. He listened as the footsteps of the fangirls rapidly approaching, fingering the knife behind his back and smirking.

_This is gonna be fun…_

Black Siren rounded the corner of the alley, staring down it. The light had faded now, and it was hard to see through the heavy darkness. Even the Southern California sun couldn't brighten up the alley, but she knew that her love was somewhere in there. She gulped down her fear and thought of his beautiful face and his cold unfeeling eyes. Siren didn't realize that these eyes were staring her down as she thought these things. She crept through the darkness, her arms outstretched into the air.

Ice Heart and Stone Rose screeched to a halt in front of the alley, breathless from running. "We can't let Black Siren reach Yami Bakura before us!" Ice panted.

"You're right. We have to present Yami Bakura to Serenity Lost before she does. If we don't, she'll be a higher power than us!" Stone sighed. Serenity Lost was the leader of CYB, and she was so in love with him that she dressed, talked, and laughed like Yami Bakura. She even stabbed herself in the exact same place that Yami Bakura stabbed his Hikari. Her obsession was so intense that before she ran away and started the cult, her parents had considered sending her to a rehabilitation center. She was legally insane and proud of it. The people who defied the cult were tortured by being locked away from the others for a week, away from any sign of Bakura. Usually it drove the members mad, and most came out with torn-out hair and bloodshot eyes from lying awake drawing Bakura on the walls.

The two girls rushed down the alleyway, their eyes adjusting to the sudden change of light. Stone Rose removed her sunglasses and pocketed them, her eyes fully adjusted from the years in shades. She gasped at what she saw at the end of the alley.

Yami Bakura was standing over the dead body of Black Siren, holding the bloody knife in a clenched fist. Stone Rose's heart began beating hard and fast out of fear and love, and Ice Heart clutched her left arm before collapsing on the ground, literally scared to death.

Yami Bakura approached swiftly, the knife a silent threat in his hand.

"You have no idea how long I've admired you, Zorc!" Stone Rose said dreamily, staring from Bakura's face to the knife and back. He grinned evilly, and gripped her in a tight headlock.

"Please, don't do this! I'm your biggest fan!" Stone Rose screamed. Yami Bakura eased his grip slowly, then pushed her back into the wall.

"I don't care if you're my biggest fucking fan…"

_SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEAM!_

_Told you it'd be fun…_

**END**

See Shonen Jump, March 2006.


End file.
